Missing
by Trinnerti
Summary: Oneshot. Feeling she wouldn’t be missed by anyone she wanted to disappear in the black void forever. slight KakaSaku.


A/N: Another one-shot from me. I know I should be working on the next chapter of left behind. But I can't come up with the right words for the next chapter. This one is inspired by the song of Evanescene; Missing, explaining also the title ^^. I delicate this fic to a very good friend of mine and my beta V.

Summary: Feeling she wouldn't be missed by anyone she wanted to disappear in the black void forever.

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto

**Missing:**

The smile she always wore on her face was fake as was her laughter. But still nobody noticed it, they barely paid attention to her. They thought she was the happiest member of her team since she still had her parents, she didn't have the pain of people telling her she was a monster or the pain of the knowledge that the brother she'd held so dear was the murderer of her entire clan. But what they didn't know was that they were far from the truth.

Her shining emerald eyes full of life and determination started to slowly dull as each day moved on till the last sparkle disappeared from the depths of her eyes. The real smile she had smiled when she'd became friends with Ino, the one she'd used when she found out she was on the same team as Sasuke and going to be trained by the legendary Kakashi Hatake had faltered and had been replaced by a fake one.

Sakura sighed, her back towards the village she had lived in all her life. She wondered briefly if anybody would miss her but quickly dismissed the thought. It was foolish. Nobody would miss her, why should they? Her parents didn't look at her anymore since she failed the chuunin exams. Sasuke had left her when she'd confessed that she loved him. Naruto had left the village, not intentionally trying to hurt her as he trained hard to be able to bring the Uchiha back one day as he'd promised but still, she **was** left behind. The teacher she'd looked up to with such reverence despite his habitual lateness and porn reading had never acknowledged her, always a disappointed glint in his eye when he did look at her. That was all that she was, a total disappointment… to everyone. It didn't matter that she had perfect chakra control, could do things the boys had taken ages to master in one quick easy step. She was just a young lovesick girl who was weak, always in need of protection and standing on the side lines of battle watching as the ones she held dear did all the fighting.

She had tried to change, so hard in fact. She was the first to walk up a tree on her first attempt. But still she wasn't recognized, the Copy Nin's attention trained upon his two prodigies instead. She even went to Tsunade-shishou for guidance, but even than she felt like she was a hopeless cause. In the end she would just be a burden on her team like she always had been and always would be. She knew that now.

Turning her head to look over the sleeping village, a faint sad smile was placed upon her lips. If she were to disappear her parents wouldn't have to be ashamed of her anymore, Naruto wouldn't have to look out for her anymore, Sasuke wouldn't find her annoying anymore, Tsunade could find a much more suitable apprentice, someone worthy of the legendary Sannin's skills and Kakashi would no longer have to feel disappointed in her. They would be better off without her. She knew that even though she tried her hardest in everything she did, it would just never be good enough.

Tears started to leak out of her eyes, her heart breaking and shattering into a thousand splintered pieces with the loneliness she felt. The mask she had worn since the end of the chuunin exams started to crack and it tumbled off her face like a raging waterfall as her true emotions flowed free. All the pain and sorrow she felt bubbled up to surface, breaking through all the walls she had tried to cover them up with. A sob so full of agony filled the air, making wolfs want to cry out in sympathy for the lost sheep they could hear finally breaking so far very far away. Because in the end she was alone. Everybody moved on, not even sparing a glance for the one that needed their help and love the most. She was sucked into the darks depth of loneliness, insecurity and weakness. There was nothing she could do but watch as the dark tendrils of despair wrapped themselves around her wrists, waist, ankles and neck to pull her inside and chain her to the void forever.

Her eyes swept over the village one more time before she cast them downwards. Turning slowly on her heels she started to make her way to the last place she would visit on this earth. Clouds were starting to fill the bright evening sky as she neared her destiny. As if they were preparing themselves to cry for the girl, tears of sorrow and shame for the unloved, under appreciated wonder that was… Sakura Haruno.

She kneeled down before the memorial stone, brushing her soft hand against the names of people she had lost and held so dear. Soon she would be joining them, no longer would she linger alone. She leaned in, her head touching the cold surface of the stone while the first rain drops started to fall. It started slow and soft, like the weeping of a woman for her lost lover but in a few moment's of time it grew thicker, soaking her through the bone and falling like a deluge of cold hard metal weapons.

Her always bright, pink hair was now hanging dull as a curtain before her face, her hands digging into the now soggy mud beneath her while she cried out her pain. Why couldn't anyone hear her screaming? Feel her heart breaking? Why didn't they notice she was falling deeper and deeper into the dark depths and was bleeding like a wounded lamb at the slaughter? Oh right, nobody cared otherwise she wouldn't have been rejected by her first teacher, Sasuke wouldn't have left her, Naruto would still be here… It was her own fault, nobody else to blame but herself.

She turned her head upwards, letting the rain drops hit her face and joining the salty tears streaming down her cheeks. The images of faces she had known appeared before her, smiling faces of the people she'd called friends and family, the slideshow finally stopping with the image of her genin teacher's smiling face. She'd always had a weak spot for him, even worse than she had with Sasuke. But it didn't matter now did it? She was weak and a dumb love struck child in his eyes, not worthy of his teachings nor his friendship. Besides she wouldn't be here any longer, she would release them from the burden of having to always look out for her.

Her hand slid towards her belt, grabbing the wakizashi she had grabbed from her father's weapons arsenal before she had left home. Titling her head back down, she pulled the short blade out of its saya, admiring the craftsmanship of the blade. The hilt was black with red, inlays and on the steel itself was written an inscription her father had shared with her so proudly when she had graduated from the academy. 'Don't give up without a fight.' Her salty tears hit the base, blurring her vision. She was giving up. She was too tired to keep struggling against the welcoming darkness and there was no one who even cared to stop her.

Placing the saya next to her on the ground she held the short blade now with both hands, the tip touching her stomach teasingly. Taking a deep breath she closed her eyes, flashes of her friends coming before her memory.

"I'm sorry that I bothered you all with my existence," She whispered before thrusting the sword deeply into her body. She gasped, her eyes widening with shock while her mouth opened in a silent scream. Blood started to leak from the corners of her mouth as faint but satisfied smile found its way to her pale lips. She felt the strength leaving her and with a soft thud, she felt the wet grass and mud touching her skin. She watched dully as the rain poured down on her, embracing the new coming darkness as her eyes slowly closed for the last time.

**xXx**

Kakashi awoke with a start when a loud thunder sounded outside. Cold sweat was running down his body while his black undershirt clung to him like a second skin. Throwing the sheets off of him he buried his face within his hands. It was only a nightmare. But still he felt a deep seated unease, something way down inside was telling him that something horrible had happened. Turning his head to look outside he saw the rain pouring down like there was no tomorrow.

Falling back onto his bed he gazed up at the ceiling. Taking a deep breath he closed his eye's again to try to get back to sleep. But another loud thunder made his mismatched gaze snap open, his eye's wide in alarm and as he sat up once again, the feeling he had increased ten fold.

"This is not going to work," he mumbled. Dragging himself out of bed he quickly pulled his clothes on. He knew he couldn't sleep until his mind was at ease again and so passing through his small apartment he tried to calm himself down. Another crack of thunder roared through the air and this time Kakashi clearly saw an image of Sakura, broken and bleeding plastered almost like a poster upon his window. His eye's widening further in shock, he rubbed them and blinked a few times to look again, but all he could see now was the raindrops connecting with the glass and running down it in waves of clear fluid.

Turning around sharply he grabbed his coat before opening his apartment door to run outside. He knew what he'd seen, and the feeling that he had was telling him something was sorely amiss and his intuition had never failed him before. Making his way towards the Haruno's compound he leapt up into the tree that stood before Sakura's window. But instead of seeing the sleeping pink haired girl as he'd hoped all he saw was her room, cold, unoccupied and empty. Her bed was untouched and he noticed a piece of paper lying upon her desk. Slipping into her room easily he took a brief look at it. Hoping that it would give him a hint as to where she might be. But what the paper contained made his blood run cold.

Swallowing the lump which had formed in his throat he kept searching, knowing that his student needed his help. If only he could make it to her on time. Coming close to the training grounds he noticed another scent, one that mingled with the scent of the rain and almost overpowered it for his strong sense of smell. His eyes as round as saucers now he prayed with all that he had that it wasn't what he thought it was. The stench of spilt blood hung thick in the air almost making him to want to gag. Increasing his pace he saw the memorial stone rising before him in the horizon. But what he saw below it made his already chilled blood freeze to solid ice. A person was lying there on the ground, injured and hurt. Another thunder cracked through the air, it was long enough to let Kakashi see that the person lying there had dull pink locks.

Racing towards the limp form of his student, he fell down on his knees next to her form. Grabbing her shoulder he noted she felt already cold, frigid like a corpse. Turning her around he saw the short blade sticking out her stomach, blood still pouring out of the wound.

'_No, no. This can't be happening. It can't!'_ Shaking the girl with trembling hands he desperately tried to wake her up, yelling her name and begging her to awake and look at him. But deep within his heart he knew it was hopeless, she was already to far gone to come back to the living. Hugging the girl with all his might he cried out, his pained voice resounding through out the area and rivaling the thunder as he howled his pain. Cradling her cold, dead body in his arms as his head rested between her neck and shoulder and he whispered softly to her "I'm so sorry for everything." Over and over again he said it, his voice loosing volume with every utterance of the choked litany. Because he knew it was his fault she had ended up on this path. He should have seen it coming when he noticed her smile would fall from her face when she thought nobody was looking. She felt left behind, a burden on everyone, a failure to them all and thinking she wouldn't be missed as she would simply disappear from the world.

_Please, please forgive me  
But I wont be home again  
Maybe someday you'll look up  
and barely conscious__,__you'll __say to no one _  
_"Isn't something missing?"_

_You won't cry for my absence I know  
You forgot me long ago  
Am I that unimportant?  
Am I so insignificant?  
Isn't something missing?  
Isn't someone missing me?_

_Even though I'm the sacrifice  
You won't try for me not now  
Though I'd die to know you love me  
I'm all alone  
Isn't someone missing me?_


End file.
